"I am always doing that which I cannot do, in order that I may learn how to do it"
- Pablo Picasso
I am one those people that talk a lot about doing, but don't actually do. I've always been interested in making a living from being a musician, singer/songwriter. In order for that to happen though, people need to hear my music, know about my live shows and have the opportunity to get to know me. Deep down, I know the merit in regularly releasing material, being active, showing my work, but for the past 4 years I've been silent.
My creativity was housebound, with only the walls and floors privy to my musical prowess. I tweeted a handful of times (then deleted my profile), boycotted facebook, and was halfheartedly interested in instagram. I didn't upload a single cover, play a single gig, record or share any demos, and I didn't support any live grass root gigs. It was completely naive of me to think that I could still have a career doing what I love, whilst not doing these key things that contribute to the process. I learnt a lot from going into hiding, but I could have learnt it all in the light too. For me, I think that which I hold most dearly, care most about, want so badly, is bound by my endless, and often fruitless pursuit of perfection.
The thought occurred to me in the throws of planning my weekly blog, that I find writing a blog easier than actually doing my music. In fact, I'd go as far to say as I enjoy this time more than researching protools tutorials and obsessing over rhyming the word flux. Yet I haven't studied writing, practiced writing, call myself a writer or can confidently argue grammar for hours. I think the trick here, is that I have no pressure to be good at this, and I have no sense of expectation from myself, or from other people. I'm simply doing it because I enjoy it and I can. In the same way people who love singing, upload covers on YouTube and have millions of views/followers, and now have successful music careers. It wasn't necessarily because of talent or circumstance, but because they shared their work.
To the bonefied professional writers out there, who are more articulate, grammatically correct and witty than most, let my fledgling approach to writing, be motivation and encouragement for you to do what you do best. Write. Just like all the YouTube stars are inspiration for me.
Nothing is wrong with pursuing excellence, if we don't muddle it with perfection. This pursuit, and it is in fact a pursuit, should liberate us on the journey to become masters of what we do. We need to learn from our mistakes, risk failure and embrace a novice attitude so we're always progressing, sharing and growing as artists. A great book for this is http://austinkleon.com/show-your-work/.
Last week I challenged myself to release something. Below is what I achieved after an afternoon of work. There are so many errors, and elements that I am not happy with, but that is not the point. The point was acting on what I'm always talking about, and I will continue to do this until I reach a sense of excellence. I hope this encourages all the creative people out there, facing the same mental hurdles to get started as I do, to take the pressure off, and to get out there and show your work!